9:03 p.m., March 19, 2015
[Auto-generated technical note for current reviewer Phillip Khalid:]
Servaline 2.0 voice analysis indicates that the following caller was not customer Jeremy G*****.
However, the caller was using Jeremy G*****'s mobile device.
To help Servaline Inc. better understand our customers, please note each time a new caller uses the customer's phone to access our services.
"Thank you for calling Servaline 1.9, your automated directory assistant. How are you today?"
"Looking up: 'You're on speaker. It's Frank. Talk.'"
"First listing: Frank Talk Pictures, 901 Crescent Street. The number is (***) **--"
"Looking up: 'Jeremy, you buy me a couple rounds and ask me to cut you some slack on your debt? That’s fine.”
"First listing: Couple Round's Pub. The number is--"
"Looking up: 'But no matter how much you buy, I'm not going to believe this answering machine got you a job.'"
"First listing: Get the Job Employment Service. The number is --"
"Your response, '“It's just a computer, Jeremy. It's not alive. I can say whatever I want. Watch: Bla bla bla bla bla bla. I'm drunk, and Servaline still suuuuuucks. No, no, wait, I got a better one. Watch this,' is too long. Please rephrase your response."
"Looking up: 'I'm so lonely I think the phone is talking to me. I'm Jeremy, boohoo.'"
"First listing: Jeremy B******, Apartment 713 on Town Lane Drive. The number is (***) ***--"
"Looking up: 'I'm such a failure, I couldn't even keep Sarah around, even though she was a complete sk--'"
"It sounds like you said, 'Ow! OW! My arm!!' Is this correct? Do you need medical attention?"
"Your response, 'That's it, G*****! You're done. I was going to give you more time, but now I want that money by Sunday. Don't pay? I send my guys to your apartment,' is too long. Please--"
"Looking up: 'Three days, G*****. Oh, and answering machine? Jeremy says, "Goodbye." Ha.'"