"This facility has the finest of security systems," the Tour Guide said.
A spent missile-casing, the size of a large rodent, rolled by Trak’s right front foot.
“You may find this rude, but I do not believe you,” Trak said.
“True, all security systems are offline while we await an upcoming upgrade,” the Tour Guide said. “But the system itself is cutting edge.”
“Ah,” Trak said. “So any being could fire its weaponry onboard –”
“Please do not activate your weapons in the halls,” Tour Guide said quickly.
“And you would have no way to stop it?”
“Not until the system is upgraded.”
Trak puzzled over this a moment.
“You have teleporters,” Trak said. “Couldn’t you threaten to send any security threats into the vacuum of space?”
Trak immediately regretted his question.
Trak had a habit of asking questions that would later make his life harder. His refurbished “curiosity” module was almost as powerful as his arsenal, and just as awkward during social functions.
He’d once asked Jeska why she’d chosen an unflattering hair color. He’d once asked Rachel-7 why she thought she was the best pilot in the universe. He’d once asked Alitma why his management style was so inefficient.
All three of the questions produced uncomfortable – and in the case of Rachel-7, painfully boring – conversations.
In this case, he hoped his question hadn’t just reminded a senile Aye that it could teleport him overboard.
“Jettisoning is only for dangerous intruders,” the Tour Guide answered.
Trak felt surprised.
“I’m not 'dangerous'?” he said, as a second missile casing slid passed his left foot.
“A dangerous intruder is defined as someone who declines to take the facility tour before the allotted time limit expires. You have agreed to take the tour, therefore you are not a dangerous intruder. You don’t get jettisoned into the vacuum of space.”
The Tour Guide added, “Though, to be fair, it’s not really a vacuum anymore.”
“I don’t understand.”
Tour Guide said nothing.
“Please excuse my bluntness,” Trak said, “but I am tired of your puzzling statements.”
“Your friend Rachel-7 said the same thing … though she said it in a much harsher tone,” the Tour Guide said brightly. “And she used more curse words. Many, many more curse words. Would you like to continue your tour?”
“I have a few more questions.”
“Please hold all questions until the end of the tour.”
“But you just answered my questions about the station’s security system,” Trak said.
“Please hold all questions until the end of the tour."