The murder plot was eons in the making, and the Destroyer, a prisoner of Stuck Station for 2.7 billion years, had eons to spare.
He developed the assassination plan in the early days of his incarceration, when the second crew of Stuck Station, team You’ve Got to Be Kidding, explained to the Destroyer why they were using tiny paper rectangles to kill time.
Yes, cards predate the human race. Humanity also wasn’t the first species to develop the wheel, the steam engine, or Velcro.
Throughout the universe, cultures go through predictable growth patterns and certain useful devices and products are inevitable. Humanity was, however, the creator of Pac-Man, poker, and the double-cheeseburger.
Planning the murder had been the easy part. Given the Destroyer’s intellect, the time it took to conceive the scheme was close enough to zero to actually be zero.
The hard part was … everything after the easy part.
Convincing a Stuck Station crew to let the Destroyer play cards would have been simpler if every crew in Stuck Station history hadn’t disliked him. “Disliked” might not be the right word.
“Murderously hated” is more apt.
Stuck On: Team Names
The First Seven Containment Facility One Team Names
Crew One
Abundant Sorrow. (2,699,997,587 B.C.)
Crew Two
You've Got to be Kidding. (2,699,997,586 B.C.)
Crew Three
No. (2,699,997,586 B.C.)
Crew Four
We Refuse to Participate. (2,699,997,586 B.C.)
Crew Five
Stop Asking Us. (2,699,997,586 B.C.)
Crew Six
Stop it! (2,699,997,586 B.C.)
Crew Seven
Fine, We're the Stuck Station Team. Leave Us Alone. (2,699,997,586 B.C.)
